In my post, 3 Ways To Keep Females In Coaching And Athletics Administration, I talk about the lack of ladies in athletics…and the numbers were pretty dramatic. If you’re interested in seeing all of the numbers and a link to the study, just click on the article and it’s all there. Here are a few: 43% of female teams have female coaches, 19% of athletics directors are female, and only 12% of SID’s are women.
Those numbers make me tilt my head to the side, Scooby Doo-style, and say “ruh roh”. Apparently this isn’t just an athletics problem, because there is a great video over on ted.com by Sheryl Sandberg, the COO of Facebook. It’s called Why We Have Too Few Women Leaders and it’s fabulous! She talks about how two-thirds of married men who are executives have kids…while only one-third of their female cohort can say the same (more on that later). She also gives her disclaimer that there’s nothing wrong with staying home with your kids, but if you want to stay in the game…
Here are the 3 things that females need to be successful executives/leaders/coaches/administrators
Sit at the table. She says one of the more powerful statements that I’ve heard in a while about us ladies, “women systematically underestimate their own abilities.” What she means by sitting at the table is for ladies to see themselves as more. She means that when there’s a meeting and all of the bigwigs are sitting at the conference table…women should too. Don’t sit off to the side because you don’t think you belong with the big dogs. Too often, we ladies attribute our success to others rather than owning it…so we not only see ourselves as less than, we put ourselves in a position to be seen as less than.
Make your partner a real partner. How about this? When both spouses work full time, the woman does two times (!!) as much housework and three times as much childcare as the husband. But her point isn’t the stereotypical finger wagging at men to do more (though that would help!), it’s more of a cultural slant. She says that we put so much more pressure on boys to succeed that their self-worth is tied in to doing well at work. She wonders aloud if men earned the same amount of respect for deciding to stay at home with their kids as they got from going to work every day, if there wouldn’t be more dads who’d stay home. Which of course would let the mom be able to go out and be the wage earner.
Don’t leave before you leave. She means that women will sometimes stop looking for advancement opportunities way too early. For example, a woman will get engaged and decide that she shouldn’t apply for a job because of her future husband. Or because they’re trying to get pregnant. Sandberg calls it “quietly leaning back”. The women in these examples aren’t at the decision point (not yet married and not yet pregnant), but they’re already starting to shut down promotion options by not even trying for them. They’re still going to work, they’re still (seemingly) doing everything the same way…they’re just not trying to make that next move.
Women, we may decide that staying the workforce isn’t for us…that we’d rather stay at home. But we shouldn’t assume that we’ve got to give up our aspirations of greatness. Let’s make sure that we’ve really thought it through, that we’ve talked to our partner (maybe he’s willing to do more), and that we’re going hard until we just can’t anymore.